Sometimes, words spoken in the quiet of night linger in unsettling ways. After a tense argument, our reader lay in bed and heard her husband lean close and whisper something that broke her heart. The next day, he brushed it off with an explanation, but it didn’t make things any better.

Instead of focusing on the specific words, try to understand how your husband feels about the relationship as a whole. Ask him how he’s feeling in your marriage recently and if there’s anything bothering him. This way, the conversation isn’t about proving whether he said something hurtful, but about understanding each other’s feelings and seeing if there are any underlying problems you both need to address.

Think about whether this is the first time you’ve felt this kind of disconnect, or if there have been other moments where you’ve doubted his commitment. If this seems like a one-time issue, it may have just been a result of that argument.

However, if there are more times where you’ve felt this lack of connection or hurtful behavior, it may be a sign that you both need to work on how you communicate and express yourselves in the marriage.